Various animal jokes 

There was once a puppy called
May
who loved to pick quarrels with animals who were bigger than she

was. One day she argued with a lion. The next day was the first of June.

Why ? Because that was the end of May!

What happened to the lizard in the

wizard's garden pond?
He had him newt-ered.

What purrs along the road and leaves
holes in
the lawn?
A Moles Royce.

One goldfish to his tankmate:
''If
there's no God, who changes the water?''

What is a buttress?
A female
goat.

How should you treat a baby
goat?
Like a kid.

What's at the end of Moby Dick?
A
whale of a time!

Did you hear about the whale who
couldn't keep a
secret?
He was a blubber mouth!

What do you get if you cross an eel
with a
shopper?
A slippery customer.

What do you get if you cross a bottle
of water
with an electric eel?
A bit of a shock really!

What is a whale's favorite TV
show?
Flukes of Hazard!

Why don't whales eat sushi very
often?
Of course whales like sushi. It's just those itty-bitty chop
sticks
that keep getting stuck in their teeth.

Why did the whale like the

diver?
Because he had flippers!

What kind of whale flies?
Pilot
whales!

Why did the gray whale go on a
diet?
Because he wasn't a Fin whale!

Why did the whale cross the road ?

To get to the other tide !

What is a
dolphin's favorite TV
show ?
Whale of fortune !

Why did a gambler scare everyone out

swimming?
He was a card shark!

Are shellfish warm?
No they're
clammy!

What lives in the ocean, is grouchy and
hates
neighbours ?
A hermit crab !