Sport Jokes 

Where do football directors go when they are fed

up ?
The bored room !

Manager: I thought I told you to lose weight.
What
happened to your three week diet ?
Player: I finished it in
three days !

How do you stop squirrels playing football in

the garden ?
Hide the ball, it drives them nuts !

Why didn't the dog want to play football
?
It was a boxer !

Which insect didn't play well in goal ?
The
fumble bee !

Where do spiders play their FA Cup final
?
Webley stadium !

What lights up a football stadium ?
A
football match !

If you have a referee in football, what do you

have in bowls ?
Cornflakes !

What is a goal keepers favourite snack
?
Beans on post !

How do hens encourage their football teams
?
They egg them on !

What tea do footballers drink ?
Penaltea !

Where do footballers dance ?
At a football
!

What did the bumble bee striker say ?
Hive
scored !

Why did a footballer take a piece of rope onto
the
pitch ?
He was the skipper !

How did the footbal pitch end up as triangle
?
Somebody took a corner !

Which England player keeps up the fuel supply
?
Paul gas coin !

What does Paul Inces mum make for Christmas
?
Ince pies !

What does a footballer and a magician have in
common ?
Both do hat tricks !

Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear

?
Because he liked sole music !

What does a basketball player do before he

blows out his candles?
He makes a swish!