Dentist jokes 

A patient came to
his dentist with problems
with his teeth.

Patient: Doctor, I have yellow teeth, what do I
do?

Dentist: Wear a brown tie!

A dentist, after completing work on a patient,

came to him begging.

Dentist: Could you help me? Could you
give out a few of your loudest,
most painful
screams?

Patient: Why? Docor, it wasn't all that bad this time.

Dentist: There
are so many people in the waiting room right now, and I
don't want
to miss the four o'clock ball game.

Dentist begging the patient: Could you help
me?
Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful
screams?
Patient: Why? Doc, it isn't all that bad this time.
Dentist:
There are so many people in the waiting room right now and I
don't
want to miss the 4 o'clock ball game.

A husband and wife entered the
dentist's
office. The husband said, ''I want a tooth pulled. I don't want
gas
or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as

quickly as possible.''

''You're a brave man,'' said the dentist.
''Now, show me which tooth
it is.''

The husband turns to his
wife and says, ''Open your mouth and show the
dentist which tooth it
is, dear.''

''I came in to
make an appointment with the
dentist.'' said the man to the receptionist.

''I'm sorry sir.''
she replied. ''He's out right now, but...''

''Thank you,''
interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient.
''When will he be out
again ?''

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth,

but don't worry it will take just five minutes.
Patient: And how
much will it cost?
Dentist: It's $90.00.
Patient: $90.00 for just
a few minutes work???
Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you
like.

Why did the dentist
make a poor date with
the manicurist?
Because they fought both tooth and nail!

What does
the dentist of the year get?...A
little plaque.

''I am sorry, madam, but I shall have to charge
you hundred dollars for
pulling your boy's tooth.''
''Hundred
dollars! Why, I understood you to say that you charged only
twenty
dollars for such work!''
''Yes,'' replied the dentist, ''but this youngster
yelled so terribly
that he scared out four other patients out of
the office.''

Patient: ''It must be
tough spending all
day with your hands in someone's mouth.''
Dentist: ''I just think of it
as having my hands in their
wallet.''

What did the
werewolf eat after he'd had
his teeth taken out?
The dentist.

How many dentists does it take to change a

light bulb?
Three. One to administer the anaesthetic, one to
extract the light
bulb, and one to offer the socket some vile pink
mouthwash.

As the judge said to the dentist: Do you

swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the

tooth?

Nigel: You said
the school dentist would
be painless, but he wasn't.
Teacher: Did he hurt you?
Nigel:
No, but he screamed when I bit his finger.

Why are you laughing?
My dentist just
pulled one of my teeth out. I don't see much to laugh
about in that.

But it was the wrong one!

Fred's mother was on the
telephone to the
boy's dentist. ''I don't understand it,'' she
complained, ''I
thought his treatment would only cost me $20, but you've
charged me
$80.''
''It is usually $20, ma'am,'' agreed the dentist, ''but Fred yelled
so
loudly that three of my other patients ran away!''

Monster: Doctor, doctor, I'm a blood-sucking
monster
and I keep needing to eat doctors.
Doctor: Oh what a
shame. I'm a dentist.

I'm suffering from bad breath
You should
do something about it!
I did.
I just sent my wife to the
dentist.

Dentist: Don't worry. I'm
painless.
Patient: I'm not.

Patient: Doc, what should I do with all the
gold
and silver in my mouth?
Dentist: Don't smile in a bad
neighborhood.