Apple jokes 

What kind of apple isn't an apple?
A
pineapple.

What did the apple say to the apple
pie?
''You've got some crust.''

What did the worm want to do when he grew

up?
He wanted to join the Apple Core (Corps).

How do you make an apple turnover?
Push it
down hill.

What did the Gorilla do with the apple
he was
holding in his hands?
He brought it to school and said, 'An Ape-lle
for the
teacher!'

What's the difference between a worm and an
apple ?
Have you ever tried worm pie ?!

What reads and lives in an apple ?
A bookworm
!

If it took six pigs two hours to eat the apples
in the
orchard, how many hours would it take three pigs?
None,
because the six pigs have already eaten them all.

A Pittsburgh steel worker was driving through

northern California's apple country.

He stopped at an orchard
and asked the owner, ''How much are yer
apples?''

''All you
can pick for one dollar,'' said the rancher.

''Okay,'' said the
Pennsylvanian. ''I'll take two dollars'
worth.''

After a minor mathematical error on a routine
report, a worker's boss
tried to belittle him in front of his peers.
Angrily she asked, ''If
you had 4 apples and I asked for one, how
many would you have left?''
Quickly he replied, ''If it was you who
asked, I'd still have 4
apples.''

Why did the farmer hang raincoats all over his
orchard?
Someone told him he should get an apple Mac

What kind of apple has a
short temper?
A
crab apple.

Why don't apples smile
when you go bobbing
?
Because they're crab apples !

What do you get if you cross a jogger
with an
apple pie ?
Puff pastry !

Why did Eve want to move to New York ?
She
fell for the Big Apple !